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What Other People Think

February 14, 2019

 

 

When I find myself worrying about what other people think of me, 

 

I try to ask myself a simple question:

 

'I wonder why I'm choosing to worry about this?'

 

And usually I don't have a good answer.

 

I mean, really, why? 

 

Why do we worry about other people's opinions of us?

 

I think that our brains sometimes believe it's dangerous if others think negative thoughts about us.

 

Is it?

 

Of course it's not.

 

Other people are allowed to think whatever in the heck they want.

 

And it doesn't say anything about our worth or value.

 

Truly,

 

What other people think of me is none of my darn business.

 

That thought is so freeing to me. 

 

I mean,  


I get to be the kind of person I want to be---

 

because it's how I want to show up in the world.

 

Not because I want to try to manipulate another person's opinion of me.

 

Because, first of all, 

 

that usually doesn't work.

 

And second of all, 

 

it's kinda creepy---

 

The whole 'trying to manipulate another person's opinion' thing.

 

I used to get upset when people didn't understand that being a doctor doesn't mean what the soap operas portray it to mean:

 

You know, 

 

Unlimited funds, 

 

extravagant vacations, 

 

living a life of luxury. 

 

But then I decided that it really didn't matter if others understood about our student loan debt, 

 

or the long hours, 

 

or that our life doesn't look much like Grey's Anatomy at all (good thing!)

 

I realized that it was ok for them to be wrong about me. 

 

Sure, I'd love the approval of everyone, 

 

Love for everyone to love me.

 

But not everyone is going to understand the value of the work you do in the world.

 

The value of the work you do in your home.

 

And that's totally ok. 

 

So whether you are pursuing your dreams as a writer, 

 

or a stay-at-home mother, 

 

or an entrepreneur. 

 

just remember---

 

you're the only one who needs to get your own back. 

 

You might want the approval of others, 

 

but you don't need to need it. 

 

Like Byron Katie has said, 

 

Others don't need to understand you or approve of you. 

 

That's your job. 

 

 

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